7″ and Video Release countdown – (Part 2) In which we discuss “My Desire” and the awesomeness of the Pain Teens

We’re posting our weekly press releases here as we countdown the weeks until the record release show. This week, it’s all about the B-Side…



The Pain Teens (1991)

The Pain Teens (1991)

There were a lot of Pain Teens shows I’d seen over the years but one always stuck in my head. It was sometime in the late 80’s or early 90’s… I can’t recall.. but it was your typical night at the Axiom – a room filled with sweaty kids bobbing their heads to one of Houston’s most revered bands as Scott Ayer’s twisted guitar lines bounced off the walls and Bliss Blood commanded the stage in full-on dominatrix mode. She reached back and cracked her whip and when it came down, it hit some poor sod square in the face. Horrified, Bliss broke character and bent down at the edge of the stage saying, “Oh sorry! Are you OK?” It was funny in a way but also charming to see and for me it perfectly captured what made the Pain Teens so admirable; they weren’t simply phenomenal musicians and performers, but they were also good and real people. You still can catch Scott playing around town rocking with with The Electric Knives then switching hats to play some country tunes in Dead Cowboys. Meanwhile, Bliss has been doing some amazing work of her own in New York City with the Moonlighters, Delta Dreambox, Bliss Blood and Al Street, and… well she’s so busy it’s just easier to just direct you to http://www.blissblood.com/. In short, they’ve never stopped creating and challenging themselves.

But back to the Pain Teens. Often they are simply described as an industrial noise band but they never rested on their laurels. They constantly played with and refined their sound by drawing influences from all over. Sure, with Scott Ayers’ distinctive guitar and Bliss Bloods’ unique voice and lyrics the band could never NOT sound like the Pain Teens but consider the range they did play with:

Noisy experimental music, swimming in bonkers guitars, tape loops, and churning rhythms:
YouTube Preview Image

Fucked up Gothic industrial:
YouTube Preview Image

Insane instrumental rockers:
YouTube Preview Image

YouTube Preview Image

Shoegazy songs with pretty guitar lines:
YouTube Preview Image

Hell, even a James Bond movie theme…
YouTube Preview Image

and straight up pop:
YouTube Preview Image



They were definitely a big deal for a reason. Funny enough, given the band’s sophisticated experimental nature, my favorite song is actually one of its simplest – “My Desire.” It’s a pounding, primal song by Bliss that manages to give no quarter and simply beats the crap out of you with just two notes (E and A#). Now, here is the thing about “simple” songs; they’re hard. It’s so much about feel, texture, energy, tone, and conviction that just learning how to play the notes is never enough. Here, check this live performance of the song and try to tell me you aren’t pinned to the wall by how many Gs of heavy they are dealing!



Which brings me to the B side of the upcoming 7″….

CisForCthulhu-RecordReleasePoster-WebSee, a while back Ralph Armin (another tireless Houston music adventurer ) was putting together a Pain Teens tribute comp and I immediately jumped up and down to do “My Desire!” We got dibs but but of course that was met with a horrible realization, “Oh shit! Were doing My Desire!” It’s a doozy of a song to get right and I was honestly worried if we could pull it off but auxiliary member Carol Sandin walked up to the microphone at the studio and belted Bliss’ lyrics like her life depended on it and, at that moment (while I would never suggest we could surpass the original), I knew that we could at least come out with a pretty damn good version that tipped its hat at the original while still delivering the Texas Psych/ knuckle dragging/ chimp rock thing we kind of do and in the end, everyone had a blast at the recording session. Unfortunately, the anthology fell through and we had to sit on this track for a while. When we decided to release “C is for Cthulhu,” it just seemed like a perfect compliment to the A side. So there you have it.

Did we succeed? Did we fail? Well that’s for you, the listeners, to decide when you hear it. What I CAN tell you is that not only will Carol Sandin join us on stage to perform the B-Side but Scott Ayers himself will be sitting-in to play guitar at the record release.

I won’t lie to you; as a guitarist and a fan of his work, I am both thrilled and terrified by this.

Posted in premieres, Recording Sessions | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

7″ and Video Release countdown – (Part 1) In Which The Linus Pauling Quartet seeks the aid of Wo Fat

With a mere five weeks from the upcoming “C is for Cthulhu,” our trusty PR agent Nicolas Pan Paniscus has been hard at work churning out press releases.  Unfortunately, being a bonobo chimp, most of his press releases read like this:

fdhjospfoj dpo joig099g v8uguog ougoungt uvnun 8089oji gj  g ioiooi o eo87g qojeg gpo pokj p[lg ik [wkwpp pe ojep ojkp[g gleglp ekep jupj p tp oj pohp[j go geigj

While we did concede that it was at least more  intelligible than a Roger Godell news conference, to us this read as utter gibberish.  Thankfully, Larry (well versed linguist that he is) soon recognized it as a long lost strain of an ancient and moribund African language.  Larry dutifully translated the text and the result is the first of our weekly press releases that we are sending out to various media folks.  Here is what he wrote:



The Mighty Wo Fat


Website: http://wofat.net/
Newest Album: The Conjuring: 

Yeah, for on Saturday 25th of October of this year, the five members of the Linus Pauling Quartet will pour their latest vat of molten metal over the battlements of Castle Rudyard’s and onto the unsuspecting crowd clamoring up its walls.  Normally, we would tell you tales of these five valiant warriors.  We could discuss, for example, the episode where Clinton Heider – renowned for his 10d6 soloing attack when he brandishes his double neck – almost perished at the hands of an antediluvian DEC 10000 AXP;  ancient though the beast was, it managed to survive these years  in its cold, dark chamber on the fumes of its own OpenVMS AXP. But that tale is for another press release….

CisForCthulhu-RecordReleasePoster-WebThis week, we instead wish to shed some light upon another group of manly men, trudging from the North Country to our humid Lowlands.  Yeah , for when the Linus Pauling Quartet sought aid in the forthcoming battle, they sought the aid of only the most mighty and wise of the Stoner Rock wizards – the trio often spoken of only in whispers of “Wo Fat.”  It was not easy to reach these men, for these masters lived in a land they call Dallas which lay many miles away along the way of the 45th.  Yet, on his mighty steed Falcor did young Charlie Ebersbaker ride to Dallas – past many a truck stop and strip club – and return in a fortnight with news that the trio had agreed to assist the LP4 and aid would soon come.

But who are these Wizards?  While little is known we will try to divulge what we can.  Kent Stump is the master in the ways of the 6-string, his vocal chants call up the dark spirits of the blackest of dirty sludgy metal.  As dark and malevolent as his riffs may seem, have no doubt, for his licks speak of true virtue.  Maidens swoon, villains cower, and the gods of metal weep when he strikes.  Tim “The Enchanter” Wilson is no less a wizard to be trifled with for his incursions into the low spectral arts has been known to cut through even the thickest defenses.  It is a known fact that mount Kovddoskaisi formed when a foolish Finnish farmer, dared mock his 4 stringed staff after Tim saved him from a flood that had overtaken the valley.  Taken aback by the farmer’s insolence and ingratitude, he rang one note and in an instant the mountain burst from the ground with a force that sent the farmer’s cottage, his livestock, and his family into the Barents Sea.  Never should one cross those who deal in the Low metal arts.  The last wizard, Michael Walter, commands the elements with the two wands he wields.   His ritualistic pounding brings forth lightning, fire, wind, and water that emanates from his pores and into his drums.  Armies have fallen, beasts torn asunder, and ziggurats have toppled at even his most subtle of beats. Make no mistake, if you worship at the feet of false metal, only ashes will remain should you be so unlucky as to cross their path but if ye be man or woman who worships truly at the altar of metal, these wizards, nay GODS of Stoner Rock will bring you the fabled Rock you seek.

If ye be true to metal, then come see them as they open for the Linus Pauling Quartet on 25 October.

YouTube Preview Image

Posted in live shows, NEATO!!!!!, premieres, video | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Knights in Satan’s Service show, the latest news on the upcoming 7″, and Two Guys Pizzeria

Steve keeping a safe distance from Clinton and the double neck.  Photo by Francisco Montes used by permission from the Houston Press

Steve keeping a safe distance from Clinton and the double neck. Photo by Francisco Montes used by permission from the Houston Press


Knights in Satan’s Service Show Recap

You know how things go, we play a show then a geological era later we post about it. Well, this is no different. Last Saturday we played the record release for the Knights in Satan’s Service record release at Fitzgerald’s. I’ll admit I was kind of dreading the show because I was doing a lot of physical activity that afternoon so I was expecting to be utterly destroyed by the time we got there but a good 30 minute cat nap on the floor of the green room and I was good as gold. Then, to make the evening appear even more promising, the guy who billed himself as the trash guy (he was in charge of the trash detail I guess), came in and ,upon seeing sad beerless cooler, proclaimed it unacceptable then dutifully promised to see it filled with the finest in canned bumy juice he could gather (which ended up being Lone Star). (Last time we played there we had to go procure our own beer which seemed oh so unbecoming so this was a step-up for us.) Now rested and beered-up is pretty solid but toss in the Hell City Kings appearing and having Bill Fool take the green room “stage” to go off on a million insane stories that would make even Keith Richards’ eras prick up (and will not to be repeated here) pretty much sealed the deal that it was going to be a great night.

I got to see a little bit of opening band Jody Seabody and the Whirls’ set before our set and it was pretty cool high energy stuff. No too much of it though as we had to prep for our set and I have to say that I came away pretty happy with the set. Some small flubs here of course – Steve’s bass cut out during “She Bad, She Thowed” for example – but overall a pretty good one and we got a lot of compliments from folks we’d never seen before so I guess I can chalk that up as a good evening for us. The other bands were pretty cool too. The aforementioned Hell City Kings played a great set. It was cool to see Christian Best back in the band (albeit this time behind a bass) while Bill Fool took the role of front man with great aplomb. The Freakouts won the gear wars with a wall of single cabinet double stacks reaching from end to end of the stage. Surprisingly not as loud as you’d expect but damn, did they look cool and they played a pretty awesome set to back it up too! Ex-optimists put on a fun set downstairs and their shoe gaze take on “God Gave Rock and Roll” was pretty mind blowin’.

Last up was Funeral Horse who simply killed it. Now here is a funny thing about FH. A long long while back I first saw the band over at Rudz. At that time, the bassist who was playing had been there for a mere week and the drummer was at best passable. In short, the deck was stacked against them. It was just felt like a show where a band was just trying to get through it while the brains of the band, Walter Carlos, nervously tossed off jokes that fell flat the entire night. No doubt a bad night for the band but here is the thing – despite that experience, all I’d heard was how awesome the band was live which ran completely against what I saw that night. In the meantime, their album came out (which was pretty solid) but the backwash of that night still kind of sat there in the back of my throat so I was kind of hesitant about what to expect this evening despite all the good word of mouth. Well, this show seemed to firmly place that Rudz show as an anomaly – a product of a band leader in search of a band to lead. In the months since then, not only has Walter found a backing band that can follow him on his most insane flights of fancy but those two cats aren’t shy of leading the charge when necessary. The result was a fun and ass whoopin’ set – a real hoot to see a band click so beautifully with the right personnel. So kudos guys on delivering the set of the evening.

Right! So, Show Pictures, eh?! OK, here you are. The ones in black and white here are used by courteous permission of Houston Press whose Francisco Montes stood behind the lens (jump to this link for more pics of the show).  The color pics are from our good pal, Luis Black.


This slideshow requires JavaScript.



Meanwhile – 7″ update

Here is how every one of our vinyl releases go.

  1. Ramon gets everyone to agree on a release date (assuming that if the band doesn’t set one, nothing will ever get done) which sets the ball in motion.
  2. Eventually, things are mailed to the pressing plant and/or the cutters.
  3. Clinton will soon become the band Cassandra and begin to spout prophecies of incompetency fueled doom from the temple of Apollo.
  4. Ramon then counters by painting the release schedule as no problem because faeries and magical woodland creatures are hard at work making sure that never will a Linus project come in late.
  5. The matter and anti-matter nature of this will eventually evolve into a beer soaked screaming match that will lead the digital prophet Charlie to exclaim “Good God, man.  WHY do we do this to ourselves … EVERY … TIME?  Why are we releasing vinyl?  It’s expensive, it a pain in the ass, and it, at best, breaks even! Why? Why? Why?”
  6. The record then appears on time for the record release a mere 5 minutes before the record release show starts.  The records look fantastic and everyone is thrilled.  Clinton thinks to himself, “We got lucky, this time!”  while Ramon goes off to thank the faeries and magical woodland creatures for not letting the band down.  Meanwhile Charlie, realizing that this is just another LP4 Pralaya in an endlessly repeating cycle of goofiness, shakes his head.

Right now we are in between the fifth and sixth LP4 Yuga.  Last week Aardvark said they sent out the stampers to A&R in Dallas and this week A&R told us they received the stampers and would have test pressings ready for us some time next week.  If the test pressings comes in a dud, we will fall back to number three in the LP4 vinyl cycle but if they check out next week, we should be in good shape for October’s release.   So here’s crossing our fingers that the faeries and magical woodland creatures are on the job.


Oh and a small side note…

I often hit up Two Guys Pizzeria.  They make some good pies and the owner, funny enough, is actually a fan of our music.  Well, the other day I was talking to him while ordering some slices and he mentioned that his daughter really liked “The Road.”  I mentioned how funny that is given we don’t play songs from that EP live because they are kind of an anomaly and they are also outside my vocal range.  But still, it was nice to hear that, despite the low key nature of and the unusually specific audience intended for that release, that it made some connection with someone out there.  So, not a big deal but just kind of, “Oh, that’s neat.” kind of thing.


OK, Until next time folks,
Keep on Rockin’ in the Free World

Posted in Albums, live shows, premieres | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Oh Shit! So, this is happening!!!!!



This poster should tell you all you need to know….

Posted in dork out!!, live shows, premieres | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment


Test Lacquers are APPROVED Test Lacquer High-Five! 

Helks yeah!   After a skippy round with the first Test Lacquer from Aardvark, the second Test Lacquer for “C is for Cthulhu” arrived yesterday and it was flawless.  We are back on track!  Nice job Aardvark folks!

Now they just send the plate over to the pressing plant and, crossing our fingers, they will have it back to us in time for the October release.  With a bit over two months to go and the plating work done by Aardvark, we should be in good shape.



It was starting to look pretty gloomy there with everyone’s crazy schedule but looks like Wednesday August 27 is going to be the date to finish the most critical remaining scenes in the video.

Makana has had a bunch of Mixed Martial Arts bouts going on (yes, she is a MMA fighter – awesomeness in spades!!)  and she’s been too busy training for those fights so we’ve had to put shooting on hold for a while but she’ll have a break from kicking ass and chewing gum so now we are back on track!  I’ve scheduled a whole day of work from my day job to prepare the set for that evening’s shoot and everyone else is ready for an evening of standing in front of a green screen.   By my estimate, I alone am looking at a 12-16 hour day for maybe 90 seconds of footage.  That’s nutters but par for the course.  What can I say except welcome to the crazy world of “film.”

After that is done, all we have left is one short, on-location shot in Galveston for the epilogue and a nightmare scene with Christian Best.   In other words, after the 27th, we’re pretty much in the home stretch. Woop!


Posted in Albums, video | Tagged | Leave a comment

Lord Bubba Hightower


Dear Houston Press,

While we are humbled by and grateful for the Houston Press Music Awards nominations granted upon us this year, our obligations to protect our quadrant of our Star System may not allow us the time to attend your ceremony this evening. This being a distinct possibility, we are sending Lord Hightower of the Galactic Council in our stead. Please note, that as a representative of the LP4 and our Carcasian Star System, any actions that he may engage in are protected by diplomatic immunity. Furthermore, as per Star Charter 38B-179.8, you are to furnish him with free beer.

Thank you again kindly for the nomination,
The Linus Pauling Quartet

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Obligatory 2014 Houston Press Music Awards Post


I guess I should do this? OK.

Yeah so  Houston Press Music Awards for this year.   Um… apparently the voting ends today blah blah blah and we got nominated for some junk but a lot of other good bands got nominated for stuff too. If you are gonna vote there are a lot of good folks to choose from like the  ‘Moccasins, Buxton, Only Beast, Omotai, Ben Godfrey, BLACKIE, TonTons, Jealous Creatures, Modfag, and Giant Battle Monster.  Honestly, we have no idea why we are even included in there.

So, vote or don’t vote. It’s not like we sweat this stuff.  Who brings beer on Tuesday is a much bigger deal for us. I mean, HPMAs are nice and we are grateful for them to consider us and all but BEER?  That’s REAL world shit right there!

OK now that’s out of the way….

You guys know what opens today?  

Hells yeah!  

Guardians of the Galaxy!   

I am f#@king stoked!


Posted in dork out!! | Leave a comment

The usual belated post-show catch-up post.

We’re always late with blog posts after a show and given the amount of junk happening around our last show, this one’s an especially late post.  The show on the 12th was surrounded by just a hella lotta activity so let me just try to catch you up.

First up, let me give you the latest deets on the 7″.  We have a date set as you know but Wo-Fat from Dallas is playing and those guys are the shit!  We really love their music and the guys are a blast.  If you’ve never seen them, you gotta come to the record release.  The 7″ itself is in the plating stage.  Aardvark sent us an acetate but it skipped at a few spots so they will be giving it another go.  That’s pretty rare for us to see but hey, that’s why they send these before we got to press.  So, a small delay but hopefully they will get it on the next pass.  Meanwhile, the stop motion for the video is now complete.  In between shows and moving, I was able to finish the last 500+ frames which means we only have live action to shoot then it’s all smooth sailing in the post-production seas.

Now as for the shows, I was exhausted but was able to make the ST37 show that kicked-off the week.  Sorry, no good pics but they played a kick-ass set.  I was pretty exhausted from filming and moving junk but ST’s set and Charlie laying down one insane solo during After Party’s set that tore through space and time made it all worth it.  The next day was the Hearts of Animals show at Cactus and it was pretty swell too.  It also made for a nice break from filming and moving.  I would have to miss out on the Friday album release at Rudz but Charlie got some good pics (see below) and from all accounts it was no less than the usual awesomeness you’d expect from Mlee.  Clinton and Steve definitely had a lot of fun playing with Mlee even though it meant a lot more rehearsals and shows for them that one week. There is exhaustion and then there is good, accomplished exhaustion.  I think for them it was the latter. By the way, you can buy the album on her bandcamp ( http://heartsofanimals.bandcamp.com/ ).    The whole week closed off with our show with PONG at Rudz and it was a blast.  We had a great crowd, PONG was a hoot to play with, and we got to play an hour long set which we haven’t done in ages.  You’d think it would be way too long to play an hour but it seemed to fly by.  Our songs are usually longer so it’s easy for us to fill-up an hour I guess.  Oh and we got to play Nausicaa behind us which was a good choice.  I hadn’t seen that movie in ages and I forgot how visually stunning it is.  Miyazaki is one of my animation heroes, so neat ya know.  Anyhow, PONG closed off the night with the whole place dancing and lights and a whole lot of whoop-up so how better to close an insane week of hard but fulfilling work?

Next show is the KISS covers anthology album release show in September.  We’ll keep you posted on that and how the video and 7″ progress.  Until then, go out and listen to that HOA album, it’s really good.

Here are some pics by Charlie, Luis Black, Kyle Phillips, and me.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.


Posted in live shows, Uncategorized, video | Leave a comment

July 5th – July 12 Shows (or Play LP4 Mix and Match)

Holy Crap!  July is shaking out to be a pretty damn busy month for us and it all pretty much plays out in a mere eight-day span with four live shows!!   So here we go, in chronological order…

Saturday 5 July!!!  


In what will be a week of mix and match your favorite LP4 members, it all kicks off Saturday the 5th with our old pals from Austin, ST37, over at Fitzgerald’s.  One of the support bands, Afterparty, is performing with a certain Telecaster wielding lad you may be familiar with – Charlie Naked.  It should be a good show and ST37 alone are worth the entrance.

Sunday 6 and Friday 11 July!!!


The very next day, it’s Album Release madness with an in-store performance by Hearts of Animals at Cactus Music.  Bonus – that show is free and sponsored by St. Arnold’s Brewery which means you also get a couple tasty free beers. The talented and lovely Mlee Marie has often graced our albums and we finally get to return the favor by playing on her new album.  The backing band is Joey Maines on drums (Mlee’s brother) and our own Steve and Clinton on the 4 and 6 string.  The official album release will be on Friday the 11th at Rudyard’s.  That show will be Free too and the line up is total A-List business.  Oh and you can pre-order the album here: http://heartsofanimals.bandcamp.com/ 

On a side note, you’ve likely seen the HOA pic of the band with the green screen behind them.  Well, a few months back while Mlee was playing around with cover ideas she asked me to key out the green screen just to see how it looked. So, I picked one pic from the shoot as a test just to show her how it could be utilized and, inspired by an old Camper Van Beethoven gag, I then slapped them on the cover of Relayer and then just got stupid after that.  Nothing ever came of these and they were never used but I thought the results were kind of funny so I figure this is likely a good opportunity to make use of a few images I had kicking around. Enjoy…

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Saturday 12 July!!!

Finally, the whole thing winds up the next night where we battle Austin’s madmen of  light and sound, Pong.  If you’ve never seen them live, this should be a treat.  They don’t play out often in Houston but when they do they bring an arsenal of lights that are just insane.  because of this, we will have to bring everything we’ve got if we want to stand a chance in repelling their relentless assault.

Should be a fun week.  Hope to see y’all.

Posted in live shows, premieres | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

The post in which we finally get to announce the “C is for Cthulhu” October release date and record release show!!!!!

Remember back in 2013 when we had this ambitious idea to release two 7″s a year and how “C is for Cthulhu” would be the second one? Remember how our original plan was for it to be released on Halloween of that year? Well prepare to double facepalm yourself because we have finally scheduled a release date for the long delayed project and it’s exactly one year later than we originally proposed! I am not messin’ with your mind, yes, the release date will be 31 October of 2014. That’s 365 days – one whole turn around the sun later! The masters have been sent off and we shoot a huge chunk of live action footage this weekend with the rest of the shooting scheduled to be done before mid July. So yes, despite the delay, we are pretty excited and we hope you guys are too.

So let me cut to the deets here…

Record Release and Video Premiere party
Saturday 26 October at Rudyard’s

Get your copy early, witness our cinematic genius, and celebrate with us and our friends!
We have two special guests penciled in to open but we can’t announce them until they get back from tour and get a chance to fully confirm.

Official Record Release Date
Saturday 31 October

The 7″ will be available for download on our Bandcamp and digital copies will be available via CD Baby, ITunes, and all the usual places.

We will offer pre-sale copies via our Bandcamp at some point and our goal will be to mail them out the week of the Rudz show so that you folks outside of Houston will have your copy in time for Halloween.

One last thing, Jason over at http://www.cryptocurium.com made the cover for us and he also created the idol you will see in our video. Check out his site it’s really neat. Here is a peek at the back cover…


Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment